Much of my work with clients involves helping others to deal with situations in a different, more positive way. Recently I have seen two examples of how people in identical situations can react very differently. There are some people in the world who often feel that they have been dealt an unfair hand, is this so or is it just that people react differently to situations? I try to help others see the positive in everything and this is the way I choose to live my life.
I wonder if you can see where this is going! Recently the world watched as 33 Chilean miners were rescued from the mine in which they had been trapped for over 69 days. During the rescue one thing that stuck in my mind was the specific order in which they were rescued. This order was determined by their psychological well being. Thirty three men that had been through an identical situation yet each one had a different reaction. Some were incredibly strong and appeared almost unaffected by the experience, others suffered awfully - yet they had all been through exactly the same thing. Juan Illanes, the third miner to be rescued, when asked what his time in the rescue shaft was like replied “like a cruise”, what a fantastically positive reaction. There are many reasons (which I may go into at a later date) that some people feel more able to cope with certain situations sometimes without seeing a problem at all, whilst others find the same situation taking over their life until whatever has happened is resolved.
Another example was in an episode of Ben Fogle’s Extreme Dreams, a group were led on a twelve day trek through the Guyana jungle to reach an amazing view of the Kaiteur Falls. There was one member of the team who victimised himself, he argued with the team daily, he continually diminished the morale of the team and on the last day when they were only half a kilometer away from the end began complaining saying he could not go on, giving every excuse possible why it was more difficult for him than the others. Again an example of someone in an identical situation to others yet felt he was in a worse situation.
Some people are lucky and naturally see the positive in situations; some have used techniques such as NLP or hypnosis to change the way they view life so that everything that happens can be turned into an opportunity, there are however a lot of people that don’t know (yet) that we can choose how to feel about situations, we can choose to feel that something is a problem, choose to allow something to cause us anxiety, choose to allow something to cause stress OR we can learn some powerful techniques to bounce through life, to let problems skim the outside but not penetrate into us. Choose to life a happy positive life where we give a nonchalant wave of our hand and say its fine.
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